I want to wear these pants.
The pictures don’t adequately show just how tight these pants are. How tight are they? These pants are sooo tight…after I buttoned them, I called for the jaws of life to get me out. They’re sooo tight…my muffin-top looks like a basket-of-muffins top. They’re sooo tight…Steven Tyler wants to borrow them. You get it. They don’t fit me. Yet.
They’re size 16. I bought them in 2007, I guess, when I was in denial about my butt breadth. The only reason the tag’s not still on them is that these pants are sooo tight…all extraneous packaging was destroyed during the taking of these photos. *grunt groan pull*
I’d like to fit into them by April 22. Good Friday. What better way to commemorate the crucifixion of our Lord and Savior than to wear new pants? That’s 5 weeks away. So I’m pressing ‘play’.