Week 50 Weigh-In

December 18, 2011

* I was sick for the better part of the week, but I think I did a decent job of rehydrating. Still, the number may be a little flu skewed.

Feeling better now. Also, the flu helped push me into healthy weight range with a BMI of 24.6. According to The Man, a 5 foot 9 chick like myself is healthy weighing between 125 (seriously?) and 168. I’m glad to be here for the first time in my whole adult life.

I wasn’t an overweight child, but in high school I started adding on weight. I weighed in the 180s during high school and college (the first time around). Then in the time between college and the Army, I accepted my genetic destiny to bake. My paternal grandmother loved baking and sweets so much that she died of complications from diabetes at age 54. I never met her. Her legacy? All her kids are diabetic; most are obese. Baking was not my friend. I used to bake my own bread, then when it started getting stale, I’d make bread pudding. I perfected those little italian wedding cookies. The recipe calls for 3 sticks of butter.  I made them every week.

Then I lost some weight and joined the Army. I worked out hard, but still ate bad, so I remained overweight. But I was satisfied with how I looked. Once I got out of the Army, I gave myself a 3-month break from working out. That became six months. Then 5+ years on the sofa with my tv remote. I still ate poorly. But this time it wasn’t my own cooking but the fast food that was doing me in. There were days when I’d eat McDonald’s for lunch AND dinner several days in a row. If I thought the staff was judging me, I’d go to a different McDonald’s for a couple days. I was like Homer Simpson trying to hide what he’d eaten from Marge. I was embarrassed about how I was eating, but not disciplined enough to change it. Like a fast food hoarder.

One of the girls from sugafixdolls recently commented on my very first post. I was a depressed, emo mess back then. Skipping nights out with friends.  Dreading another birthday. Breaking all sorts of promises to myself.  I hated what I’d done to my body and was determined to make a change. But 6 months later I was still stopping and starting. Losing then re-gaining. I learned that perseverance isn’t all-or-nothing.

Today I’m in a new place. It may seem shallow to say that I’m happier now that I’m thinner. But I am. And it’s because of the journey I started — and continue. I’m learning new things about myself all the time. I’m trying new things and connecting with new people now that my tv remote and I aren’t besties anymore.

One comment

  1. […] I just read and was very inspired by a post from Motion and Rest. This woman is HARDCORE awesome, tenacious, realistic, and honest with herself, which is why I love her blog and am so proud of her progress! So, big SHOUT OUT *WOOOOOT!* to Steph for making it happen “in motion” from here all the way to here. […]

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